The Dog's Name

Translated by
Dr. Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jnr
Saturday, July 07, 2007

So giving me a sideways glance and then her attention,

"So why are you single, I have been reading you since your marsupial days, and while its nice to see you stick to one blog for so long, why are you still single...I mean its obvious you date...A LOT?"

I was having dinner with Mdme Chiang and E@L (who was wisely shutting up at this point ~grin~) and the above is my recollection of the question with my own emphasis added and editorial liberties taken, stretched and abused, but given that I am an "arrogant tosser"* I am sure the lovely Mdme will forgive me.

So why after so many years of, if not almost constant looking, at least having a weather eye on the radar am I single?

Truth is: Buggered if I know. I'm a great catch. ~wink~ (mc edit: see you are an arrogant tosser)

Truth is: (with some honest digging) Sometimes I have dated the "will do for now" situation, where dictates of geography, proximity, and want of anyone more suitable you date someone for the companionship and friendship rather than any long lasting desire to have a relationship that is transportable and will last beyond the moment that is a simple geographic location.

Sometimes I have dated for the exoticness of it, in fact a couple of times, the romantic hopelessness of it, the adversity of life facing it was a challenge and something to battle. Geographic isolation, the long distance relationship, even the challenge of goals, dreams and even sometimes mismatched personalities all ignored for the idiotic romantic notion that "love is all you need"

Sometimes I have dated knowing it would in all likelihood end, that time, from the outset was against us, and that choices already in play would conspire and make finite the relationship...this was probably the dumbest reason to date, and the most foolish of all my endeavors because this was one in which I actually fell in love...and was helpless to do anything about when time came for it to end.

Sometimes, in fact, very often, and more so lately I have not dated but rather gone on dates to simply enjoy the company of women, their talk, their attitudes, opinions and conversation which were enough to give me pleasure and bring a smile to my lips...quite a few I have seen more than once, some I have even wanted to pursue to more serious levels, while they did not...and even now possibilities of something developing dance along my periphery as I am content to "take it slow", "not rush in" and seek a relationship that will not start floundering or as fleetingly as they have in the past.

The truth is, I am single because I have either lousy timing, the universe hates me, or simply because until now I was not really ready to date "forever" and thus sought women who were likewise positioned.

The later is no longer the case and has not been for some time, so it must be either timing or divine Karmic vengeance. Either way its not something I can control so that is why I date.

* Yes she did actually call me this, while I was being demonstrably confident in a spat of verbal brain to mouth, bypass filter moment. But I am sure she was smiling when she said it. ~grin~

Last year in the Temple of Doom, Indiana unearthed: Dusty Nothingness

Technorati Tag: The Dogs Name, Being Single, Relationships

Lectiones Sacrae Ex Libris Indiana 06:00

9 Comments:

sofia said...: some very honest digging.

and if you're truly a great catch, neither timing nor divine karmic vengeance will stop you. ;); 02:49
Mia said...: I've always said that MC is one wise woman ~grin~; 07:21
Andrea Whatever said...: perhaps you have been looking at all the wrong places - at places where the women just want to have a good time and play the field.; 09:12
Indiana said...: Sofia: Trust me its all about timing, finding someone is easy, finding someone who likes you in the same way you like them and who is also single and who also wants to be in a relationship is the hard part.

Mia: You may not think so when I post another conversation she and I had later in the week. ~grin~

Andrea: I have looked in just about every place you can imagine...and I don't think its the place itself that is the problem, its finding one woman who is truly ready to be in that place with me.; 10:31
M said...: It's not just timing (it can't be - no one would ever get together) - but also expectations (of partner and of relationship).

In any case - I have to ask, do you *really* want that 'forever' kind of relationship? I was under the impression that you thought that men were naturally geared towards not being monogamous etc.; 11:53
froufrou said...: I am in total agreement with you.

Love (together with everything else in life) is a matter of timing.... the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available and the unattainable...attainable.

So have patience and respect God's timing for you. Good luck!; 21:25
Mia said...: ~stir stir~ Mr Jones!; 05:55
Indiana said...: M: But don't expectations effect timing to some degree. I don't think men are naturally monogamous, I think biologically they are geared towards multiple partners, which is why I think the choice and the keeping of a promise to remain faithful to one woman while running counter to our genetic programming makes it an even more valuable and worthy thing.
To remain loyal and keep a vow knowing it is right while your drive says something else is the ultimate test of a mans character.

FrouFrou: The problem is remaining patient or finding more of it when it ran out so long ago.

Mia: Only a little.; 09:04
Miss Natalie said...: I've been single for 2 and a half years.

I don't know if its me, the men i met , the as you've said previously the big 'fuck off' sign i must have around my neck.

Its about time i met someone non offensive.; 12:05